Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Harriet Tubman Rises from the Dead to Troll Donald Trump on Twitter

"She was very, very courageous, believe me."
--President Donald J. Trump on Harriet Tubman
Women's Empowerment Panel, March 29, 2017

Remember that time Frederick Douglass trolled President Trump on Twitter for not realizing he was dead? Well, now Harriet Tubman has done the same thing!*

@realHarrietTubman: After 90 years, failed POTUS and slave-owner Andrew Jackson will FINALLY disappear from the $20 bill and I will MAKE THE $20 GREAT AGAIN, believe me!

@realHarrietTubman: Despite what you have heard from THE FAKE NEWS, I had a GREAT meeting with William Lloyd Garrison in Dorchester, Maryland. Big crowds! THANK YOU, DORCHESTER!

@realHarrietTubman: The Fugitive Slave Law of 1850 was a DISASTER and totally imploded! We made great progress with abolition despite VERY rude and vicious people attacking us in Congress!

@realHarrietTubman: Why doesn't DISHONEST CNN report that I carried a revolver on the Underground Railroad and was not afraid to use it? I was the original Second Amendment Person!

@realHarrietTubman: Terrible! Just found out that @realDonaldTrump called me "very, very courageous" when in fact he should have used at least five "verys!" VERY SAD!

@realHarrietTubman: I hearby hereby demand an IMMEDIATE investigation into the kidnapping of my maternal grandmother from Ghana, which total loser Ben Carson called "immigration!"

@realHarrietTubman: Totally pathetic that @realDonaldTrump asked a room full of women if they knew who Susan B. Anthony was. POTUS is overplaying his hand!

@realHarrietTubman: I spent eleven years making THE BEST DEALS to free fugitive slaves at great personal risk. Failing POTUS @realDonaldTrump can't even close the deal on colonoscopy coverage!

@realHarrietTubman: Don't believe the lying (fake news) media. The raid on Harper's Ferry was a TREMENDOUS success. John Brown is a terrific guy who has been treated very unfairly. So-called angry crowds were actually, in numerous cases, paid slave owners!

@realHarrietTubman: I'd bet a good doctor could make a great case out of the fact that I suffered a major head injury as a child at the hands of a slave owner, and was still MUCH smarter than @realDonaldTrump!  

*Not really.


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