Saturday, June 6, 2015

If Queensryche Was Your Babysitter

They'd be putting your kids to bed like ...

HUSH NOW DON'T YOU CRY!!

WIPE AWAY THE TEARDROP FROM YOUR EYE
YOU'RE LYING SAFE IN BED
IT WAS ALL A BAD DREAM
SPINNING IN YOUR HEAD

I--WILL BE LYING NEXT YOU YOU
 
I--AM GONNA HELP TO SEE IT THROUGH
I--WILL PROTECT YOU IN THE NIGHT
I--AM SMILING NEXT TO YOU...
IN SILENT LUCIDITYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
 

IF YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH FOR ME, I WILL LET YOU WATCH A NETFLIX ON TV ... 

And so on. 

That's not creepy at all! They only charge $40 an hour and you don't even have to drive them home. And, bonus: they will also play your kid's birthday and do magic tricks with their catchy Dungeons & Dragons-inspired art-metal tunes and lustrous, flowing hair.


No comments:

Post a Comment