Paige: Is Justin Bieber real?
Me: Unfortunately, yes.
Isaac: Who's Justin Beaver?
Paige: Not BEAVER, stupid Isaac. BEEEEEEEBER. B-E-E-B-I-R.
Me: I actually think it's spelled B-I-E-B-E-R.
Isaac: Is Justin Beaver a Death Eater? From Harry Potter?
Me: No . . . I think he's a something-else-eater. Specifically beavers.
Paige: He's a SINGER, stupid Isaac.
Me: Don't call your brother stupid.
Paige: Is he a boyfriend of Taylor Swift?
Me: I don't think so. I think he has a different girlfriend.
Isaac: Does he know how to make a dam?
Paige: ISAAC!! For the last time! He's NOT A BEAVER!!!
Me: Regardless, promise me you will never date a boy with gross, semi-pubescent facial hair like that.
Isaac: What does semi-pubescent mean?
Me: Forget it you guys. Let's talk about something else.