Monday, July 31, 2017

20 Things That Lasted Longer than Mooch as WH Comms Director

1. An episode of conjunctivitis.
2. A brutal menstrual cycle.
3. The shits in Mexico.
4. Many vacations.
5. Literally every job I've ever had.
6. A Russian novel.
7. A single season of the Sopranos.
8. My Alaska kids' temper tantrums about east coast heat.
9. 50% of all celebrity marriages.
10. My crush on Eddie Vedder.
11. Poison Ivy.
12. A cold sore.
13. All types of pickles.
14. The average Alaska kayak trip.
15. Snow in my driveway.
16. Socks on my living room floor.
17. Dishes in my drying rack.
18. Jack-o-Lantern on porch during Halloween.
19. A cut and color.
20. A quinoa salad in my parents' fridge that was there 10 days ago and is still literally there right now.

BONUS THING #21: One of Sting's tantric sex orgasms.

1 comment:

  1. 22. Herpes (not the cold sore variety).
    23. Gonorrhea.
    23. Syphilis.
    24. AIDS.
    25. (This page intentionally left blank)

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