Sunday, March 20, 2016

Scott Baio's Endorsement of Donald Trump Changes EVERYTHING

Those of you who may have felt a slight twinge of discomfort at the idea of a blustering, bigoted, dangerous, lying, sneering, unapologetically misogynistic, narcissistic, personality-disordered, and incontrovertibly delusional megalomaniac rising to power as leader of the free world can sleep easy tonight. 

Why? Because Scott Baio has endorsed Donald Trump for President!

That's right you guys. Scott Fucking Baio. As in Chachi from Happy Days who loved Joanie, and Charles who was in charge of our days and our nights. Now Chachi loves Donald, and the guy we wanted in charge of us wants Trump to be in charge of HIM.

And us, I guess.

If you haven't thought about Scott Baio since you last jacked off to Baywatch reruns or shoved crumpled up notes from earth sciences into your Trapper Keeper, it's time to resusrrect him in your mind as the serious policy wonk that he is.

Scott took a break from trying to find a girlfriend on reality TV (don't tell me you missed that) to join his fellow greasy C list celebrity bros--Ted Nugent and Kid Rock--in giving Donald Trump his coveted endorsement for the highest office in the land. "He speaks like I speak," Scott said, leaving the rest of us to conclude (through deductive reasoning) that Scott Baio speaks like a ginormous asshole.

Given the weight and import of Scott Baio to America--and indeed even Canada and Mexico--I think it's safe to say that Scott Baio's endorsement of Donald Trump changes everything.

Scott Baio: Make America Fonz Again!

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