Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Why?

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct?
Why do grown-ups’ armpits stink?
Why are we out of eggs today?
Why do people like to pray?
Why is that man so big and fat?
Why does the earth feel like it’s flat?
Why do we have to go to school?
Why is there doody in the pool?
Why is the garbage truck so loud?
Why has the snow not yet been plowed?
Why is Venus in outer space?
Why are there eyebrows on my face?
Why are all sharks vertebrates?
Why can’t I stay up extra late?
Why can’t I do an experiment?
Why can’t we light candles in a tent?
Why is England next to France?
Why is there a hole in the knee of my pants?
Why do worms live underground?
Why can't that toy I lost be found?
Why are nickels bigger than dimes?
Why are you sighing all the time?
Why can't men wear skirts to work?
Why did you call that guy a jerk?
Why do pickles taste like salt?
Why was the Holocaust Hitler’s fault?
Why is my Bandaid coming off?
Why do puppies sometimes cough?
Why is throwing up so scary?
Why is mom's vagina hairy?
Why are subways fast as lightening?
Why is Finding Nemo frightening?
Why did my classroom turtle die?
Why is that woman wearing a tie?
Why is a man sleeping on the street?
Why is that kid allergic to wheat?
Why can’t I have more Lego sets?
Why do people smoke cigarettes?
Why don’t Jews have Christmas trees?
Why don’t you buy us processed cheese?
Why are they singing about getting high?
Why does rain fall from the sky?
Why do parents get divorced?
Why do police use too much force?
Why do soldiers fight in wars?
Why don't we knock on strangers' doors?
Why do we need to brush our hair?
Why do we have to sit in this chair?
Why do kids lose all their teeth?
Why did they name their baby Keith?
Why does mom love vodka sours?
Why does this plane ride take six hours?
Why is there vanilla in macaroons?
Why do caterpillars make cocoons?
Why did Martin Luther King get shot?
Why is this lasagna hot?
Why are people politicians?
Why doesn't grandpa become a magician?
Why is Alaska wet and cold?
Why do people shrivel up when they're old?
Why do volcanoes sometimes explode?
Why are we driving down this road?
Why do people make big bombs?
Why do some kids have two moms?
Why do pigs play in the dirt?
Why is there nothing for dessert?
Why are we going out for dinner?
Why can't I be the "Go Fish" winner?
Why is Newark in New Jersey?
Why are camels never thirsty?
Why is a zillion such a big number?
Why are there seeds in a cucumber?
Why does cottage cheese have lumps?
Why do eagles like garbage dumps?
Why is the ocean deep and blue?
Why does three come after two?
Why do you look like you want to cry?
Every time I ask you . . . “WHY?”


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