Saturday, June 10, 2017

A Sample Feminist Agenda

A SAMPLE FEMINIST AGENDA
Marriott Hotel
June 10, 2017

8:00-9:00 a.m.: Opening Remarks with Practicum: "Defining & Smashing the Patriarchy" (BYO hammer or ax).

9:00-10:00 a.m.: Panel Discussion: "Paid Maternity Leave: Kind of a Pipe Dream Right Now, TBH."

10:00-1:00: Concurrent Sessions: 
  • 3D Screening of Wonder Woman
  • Product Showcase: Thinx Period Underwear
  • Pink Yarn Pussy Hats: New Patterns 
1:00-2:00 p.m.: Working Lunch: "How Not to Get Raped by Teaching Men Not to Rape You Instead of Changing Your Outfit."

2:00 p.m.-2:30 p.m.: Panel Discussion: "Why Do So Many Women Hate Hillary THAT Much, Even You? It's Called Internalized Misogyny, Dingbat."

2:30-3:30 p.m.:  Lecture: "Women in Science: How to Keep Men from Interrupting You and Stealing All Your Research: (Hint: Ask Them to Remind You of Their Name Every Time They Start to Mansplain the Higgs-Boson Particle)."

3:30-5:00 p.m.:  Breakout Sessions: "Women Online: The Fine Art of Blocking, Unfollowing, Muting, and Deflecting IRL Threats and Insults from IRL People While Being Called a Reprehensible Cunt."

5:00-7:00 p.m.: Body Image Dinner: "How to Eat Chocolate Cake for Dinner Without Hating Yourself, and Then in Turn How Not to Hate Yourself for Hating Yourself Anyway for Having Just Eaten Chocolate Cake for Dinner."

7:00 p.m.: Get drunk and stoned; use vibrator; pass out. 

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