Thursday, April 27, 2017

The Shitting in Paradise Relationship Paradox

There comes a moment in every relationship when you acknowledge that the other person shits. It's not a fun thing to think about, especially in the early stages, when your image of them is untarnished by (among other things) the human excretory system.

That's why I think it's KIND of a risky bet to take an early-relationship trip to somewhere like Cambodia or Mexico. The relationship might not be shits-reveal ready, and yet when you do this type of travel you almost guarantee yourself several days straight of travelers' diarrhea and a burning asshole. 

Yet there are like, sooooo many couples who do this you guys, and I actually think it's a low-key geeeeeenius relationship litmus test.

So many new relationship trips are all like, "Let's go ride motorcycles around rural South America. It'll be JUST like the Motorcycle Diaries!"

Two tamales later, it's inevitably more like the Motorcycle Diarrheas.

But that's how it goes. I guess it's better to know ASAP whether your new bae can hang with three straight days of shitting warm bowls of soup off a cliff on the side of a winding mountain road in the Andes.

If not, you'll know the relationship is doomed. If so, it's more likely than not that a few years later, you'll be shitting with the door open, talking about soccer practice and where the fuck is the IRS with our tax refund already.

1 comment:

  1. The whole point of this post is to say "Motorcycle Diarrheas"
    Thanks for a smile on a Friday!

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