Saturday, July 9, 2016

May I Suggest a Different Suggestion?

Of all the "courtesies" to suggest about visiting an airplane bathroom, the suggestion that one "wipe off the water basin" is probably the last possible courtesy on a long list of other courtesies that people on an airplane routinely ignore.

I wish someone would let me rewrite this sign, because I have about ten different ideas for it, like:

As a courtesy to the next passenger, may we suggest that you not take a 15 minute dump in a closet used by 300 other people in four hours?

As a courtesy to the next passenger, may we suggest that you aim your urine stream in the general direction of the toilet bowl?

As a courtesy to the next passenger, may we suggest that you not try to join the mile high club in here? It's an urban legend.

As a courtesy to the next passenger, may we suggest that you not contribute to the growing mound of paper goods all over the general vicinity of the garbage but yet nowhere he's the garbage?

As a courtesy to the next passenger, may we suggest you depress that little plunger thing so that the "water basin" doesn't turn into a flash flood zone?

M'kay? THAAAAAANKS.

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