Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Kim Davis Has The Mouth of The Donkey

Self-embattled and reality-challenged Kentucky State Clerk, Holy Warrior, and 2016's official "Joe the Plumber" Kim Davis was just released from jail, and according to news reports was promptly "honored like a rock star at a surreal rally." Apparently, she marched out on stage to the tune of Survivor's Eye of the Tiger, with her husband--dressed conspicuously like a scarecrow--at her side.

I can't imagine that all current members of Survivor--some of whom at least appear to be of dubious heterosexuality themselves--are all too happy about that. So I've taken the liberty of rewriting the popular Rocky theme song to fit current affairs, and re-titled it, aptly, "Mouth of the Donkey."

It goes something like this. Ahem:

Risin' up, back on the street
Did my time, looked like a jackass
Went the distance
Now I'm Huckabee’s Tweet
Just a clerk and her will to defy!

So many gays, how long can this last?
You come up with a loony sob story
You lose your grip on the bigoted past
You must fight just to keep it alive!

[Chorus]:

It's the mouth of the donkey
It's the sound of the ass
Risin' up to talk smack
About the bible
And this last known holdout
Needs reality fast
'Cause she's bleating real loud to us alllllll
Mouth of the donkey

Camera in face, outside the jail
Hangin' tough, stayin' stubborn
The law's been stated
This is all getting stale
For the folks with even half a sane mind

[Chorus]

Risin' up straight to the top
At least for a 15 minute story
Went the distance
Now I'm not gonna stop
Just a clerk and her will to defy!

[Chorus]

The mouth of the donkey
The mouth of the donkey
The mouth of the donkey
The mouth of the donkey


Mike Huckabee Kim Davis

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