Monday, January 19, 2015

The Script of a Fight That Actually Happened: Part 2

I now present a script of this morning's most ridiculous sibling fight (of many). It's fully indicative of Paige and Isaac's sibling relationship at this juncture of their childhoods:

Paige: You don't know ANYTHING, Isaac.
Isaac: Yeah I do!
Paige: Oh yeah? What's 1 + 1?
Isaac: 2
Paige: Oh YEAH? Well, what's 2 + 2?

Isaac: 4
Paige: Fine. What's 8 + 8?
Isaac: 88
Paige: No, STUPID! It's 16. Told ya' you didn't know anything. Do you even know how to spell "the?"
Isaac: No.
Paige: You need to know how to spell "the" or you can't go to kindergarten.
Isaac: Noooooooo!!!
Paige: It's T-H-E.
Isaac: I was gonna say that!
Paige: No you weren't.
Isaac: [WAILING] YES I WAS!!!!
Paige: What? I'm just saying you need to spell "the." I'm just giving you the test to go to kindergarten and I guess you're not going.
Isaac: [MORE WAILING]
Me: Paige, stop provoking him.
Isaac: Yeah, Paige! STOP EVOKING ME!
Paige: What? I'm not doing anything. I'm just trying to help him get into kindergarten. SHEESH!



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