Tuesday, January 27, 2015

The Awkward Dream

Dreams are an interesting thing, in terms of their ability to spill over into real life. 

Like when you dream about running all over Disney World trying to find a bathroom, and it's your body's way of telling you to wake up and pee. Or when you dream that you're trying to dismantle a sophisticated bomb that keeps beeping, and it turns out to be your alarm clock. Or when you dream that you bought a karaoke bar in Nepal, and you wake up to the radio playing "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey.

The disturbing part of this tendency is when you dream about a person, and you have residual feelings that creep over into your day. 

For example, a friend, partner, or family member will do something offensive (in the dream), such as write you out of their will or stand you up at a restaurant, and you have to actually stop yourself from being mad at them in real life. 

FAR worse than the "anger" dream though, is the "inappropriate and bizarre sexual encounter" dream.

I don't have these very often, but when I do I find them very awkward and disturbing. I will occasionally have these dreams with everyone from celebrities to friends to family members to people of all ages and genders. Unfortunately, they are rarely erotic. Rather, they are nauseating encounters with people whom I would never in a million years consider as a real life prospect for such a thing. It's quite uncomfortable, because the next time I talk to that person or see them in real life, all I can think about is "We had sex in my dream and it was so totally disgusting that I still remember the dream a week later."

There's nothing like running into some menopausal woman you know and experiencing this sequence of thoughts. It is vile and disturbing. And I cite it as further evidence of just one more thing that is grievously amiss in my psyche.


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