Saturday, November 29, 2014

"Free to Be Gluten Free" (to the Tune of "Free to Be You and Me")

(Alternate title: "Gluten is Worse than Vladimir Putin").

There's a town that I see 
Where they're all gluten-free
And I say it ain't far to this town from where we are
Take your wheat come with me, throw it out, and you'll see
Grab some rice, come with me, and we'll liiiiive...

In a land of the Telemark skis
In a land of the well-hugged trees
In a land of the amaranth tea
And you and me are free to be GLUTEN FREE!

I see a keg of wheat-free beer, and the time's comin' near
We'll use Tamari in this land, gluten shall be fully banned
Take my hand, come along, bring some herb for the bong
Come along, take my hand, sing a soooong...

For a land of nutritional yeast
For a land that reeks of patchouli
For a land where people quote Gandhi
For a land with a Whole Foods by me 
And you and me are free to be GLUTEN FREE!

Every boy in this land grows to be his own ski guide
In this land, every girl grows to be her own kayak guide
Take my hand, come with me where they're all gluten free
Come with me, take my hand, and we'll ruuuun...

To a land of organic honey
To a land of bad home-made kim chi
To a land of natural pregnancy
To a land of yoga devotees 
To a land of uncircumcised peenies
And you and me are free to be
And you and me are free to be
And you and me are free to be GLUTEN FREE!





No comments:

Post a Comment